Something of Myself
Thursday, November 24, 2005
This object slips into the consciousness like a grain of sand into the shell of an oyster; a pearl of imagination forms around this one small atom of reality. It is from the Self and from the Self alone that the imagination draws its strength. It is for the Self that it builds its splendid palaces.
Rene Girard
Rene Girard
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
Of understanding and beyond
How do you negotiate? Are there any set rules to be followed? Does it happen on your terms?
Is your decision to negotiate a very surrender in itself? :-) I am not talking a hostage like negotiation. I am talking about the little negotiations we make almost everyday of our lives. Tiny ones, ones that inure you to pain.
ne·go·ti·ate
v. ne·go·ti·at·ed, ne·go·ti·at·ing, ne·go·ti·ates
v. intr.
To confer with another or others in order to come to terms or reach an agreement.
v. tr.
To arrange or settle by discussion and mutual agreement: negotiate a contract.
To succeed in going over or coping with.
Therefore, how do you negotiate my history and yours? There are gaps that I am unaware of, moments that I have deliberately forgotten, incidents that have contributed sharply to make the man that I am today, events that have happened because I were responsible for them...It's like the stars in the galaxy - myriads of them...only that it's not really as beautiful as the stars.
There are so many things that I don't know about you. Your history. There is so much space in my head to store information about you. The incessant longing to understand why you did what you did. And yet knowing this, you deprive me of it. You deprive me of your history. We all do. And in the process you deprive me of your present, for it is the present that is receding, steadily, to make your history.
Can we ever tell anyone fully about ourselves? Can we even try? Are we brave enough? It takes a lot of guts to sit down, reflect, introspect and tell the person on the other side of the table, 'Mate, this is my history!' It cannot happen in a day. It will take years.
Life cannot be explained like History. But we can try - to open up. To initiate. A dialogue. A discourse.
Only then will we ever, ever be in a position to negotiate. My history and yours.
How do you negotiate? Are there any set rules to be followed? Does it happen on your terms?
Is your decision to negotiate a very surrender in itself? :-) I am not talking a hostage like negotiation. I am talking about the little negotiations we make almost everyday of our lives. Tiny ones, ones that inure you to pain.
ne·go·ti·ate
v. ne·go·ti·at·ed, ne·go·ti·at·ing, ne·go·ti·ates
v. intr.
To confer with another or others in order to come to terms or reach an agreement.
v. tr.
To arrange or settle by discussion and mutual agreement: negotiate a contract.
To succeed in going over or coping with.
Therefore, how do you negotiate my history and yours? There are gaps that I am unaware of, moments that I have deliberately forgotten, incidents that have contributed sharply to make the man that I am today, events that have happened because I were responsible for them...It's like the stars in the galaxy - myriads of them...only that it's not really as beautiful as the stars.
There are so many things that I don't know about you. Your history. There is so much space in my head to store information about you. The incessant longing to understand why you did what you did. And yet knowing this, you deprive me of it. You deprive me of your history. We all do. And in the process you deprive me of your present, for it is the present that is receding, steadily, to make your history.
Can we ever tell anyone fully about ourselves? Can we even try? Are we brave enough? It takes a lot of guts to sit down, reflect, introspect and tell the person on the other side of the table, 'Mate, this is my history!' It cannot happen in a day. It will take years.
Life cannot be explained like History. But we can try - to open up. To initiate. A dialogue. A discourse.
Only then will we ever, ever be in a position to negotiate. My history and yours.
